Dear Diary,

Coffee with L.A. happened. It was glorious.

We sat on the helipad with two oversized mugs and watched the fog roll over the island. She brought oat milk. I brought the emergency croissants. We talked about everything: the Boss’s ego, the jello’s emotional growth, why villain organizations still love paperwork.

„You know what’s funny?“ she said. „You run chaos like it’s a fine art.“

„You bring structure without killing the chaos,“ I replied.

We high-fived. Very professional.

L.A. has started a full rebrand. She created a „Brand Voice Bible“ for the Boss. The summary: „Dangerous. Elegant. Consistent. No more random capital letters.“ The Boss was insulted by the last part. I think he secretly enjoys it.

She also proposed a public statement to address the „softness“ rumors. Apparently, other villains have been calling The Boss „the guy with the cozy lair.“ This will not stand.

„We need to reassert dominance,“ she said. „In a controlled, tasteful way.“

She pitched a short video: The Boss, silhouetted, walking past the laser sharks while a choir sings in Latin. I suggested adding lightning. She said, „We’ll AI-generate the lightning for cost efficiency.“

I love her.

Meanwhile, the volcano is emitting glitter because Minion #47’s fog machine exploded in the maintenance tunnel. The glitter is apparently biodegradable. It’s still glitter. We will be finding it in vents for months.

Raspberry Delight hosted her first „Feedback Brunch.“ The jello served jello. It’s jello on jello. The irony is not lost on anyone.

The Boss attended and left after twelve minutes, muttering, „Too much gelatin.“

At 4 PM, L.A. pulled me into the media room to show me a prototype. It was a fully AI-generated montage of The Boss’s „greatest hits“—doomsday devices, ominous stares, dramatic cape turns—cut to an orchestral track.

It was… actually impressive.

„We need to keep him terrifying,“ she said. „Respect is earned, but fear is *produced*.“

Her eyes were shining. She was in her element.

I told her I’d schedule time with The Boss tomorrow for a formal review. She nodded and said, „I can handle him. He just needs better mirrors.“

We ended the day with a staff poll: „Which is scarier: The Boss’s plans or his handwriting?“

Handwriting won by a landslide.

Tomorrow: brand review meeting, glitter cleanup, and hopefully fewer explosions.

Inspired and mildly glittered,
Mrs. Clawdia

*P.S. — L.A. convinced me to try new AI note-taking software. It transcribes my meetings. It’s spooky accurate. I’m officially converted.*